My religion is very simple. My religion is kindness.

Dalai Lama

I’ve been struggling lately with religion.   I grew up 4^th generation Seventh Day Adventist but I am not an Adventist. I do not believe Ellen White is a prophet.  I do not believe that there is one true church.  I believe God doesn’t care what you eat.  I believe God doesn't care who you love.  I believe God doesn't care what day you go to church.  I believe that God isn’t about salvation by rules and law.  I believe God wants you to be kind. 

I joke with my friends and family all the time that I belong to the Church of Erin.  A place where all people are welcomed.  It’s nice, kind and inclusive. While this sounds lovely  The Church of Erin is only one person. I miss the sense of community a church brings.  So I’ve decided to start my search.  

The start of this search begins with cutting ties with the Adventist Church.  This weekend I will be writing a letter the the SDA Conference to ask that my name be taken off their roster.  It's an important part of the process for me.  It creates a new start.  

My life is my own.  My religion is kindness.  We will see about the rest. 

Happiness found in a tablecloth

Yesterday in my quest to minimize our house I ran across this tablecloth.  It was shoved into the back of the linen closet. It looks like embroidery done by a young child or someone just learning, but I know better.  It's a tablecloth done by my Grandma.  I was instantly sad.  It must be one of the last ones my Grandma made. To see her work go from beautiful to a mess made me tear up.  I wanted to throw it back into the closet and not deal with it or the emotions it invoked. I thought maybe I should throw it away. Looking at it made me sad.  One of the rules in my quest to minimize our house is to only keep the things your love or need. I definitely didn't love this piece.  I didn't want to just throw away something my Grandma made. I decided to put it back in the back of the closet.  I'd revisit it later. When Super Sexy Husband and I were getting ready for bed I pulled out the tablecloth to show him and told him how sad it made me.  I had so many questions about it. Did she know how bad it looked?  How frustrating was it to make?  Was she sad?  Why do it if it was so hard?  I started to cry just talking to him about it.  After writing in my journal before bed, I had an epiphany.  My grandmother loved to embroider.   She made anything you could ever imagine for everyone as gift.  Baby blankets for new moms, tablecloths for wedding gifts, sheets for us kids, pillowcases and fun things she framed.

Maybe it wasn't about what she couldn't do well anymore. Maybe it was something she made because embroidery made her happy.  It didn't have to be perfect.  Perfection isn't everything. I get hung up on perfection all the time.  I choose not to do things because I can't do it perfectly.  Even things I enjoy. Thank you Grandma for this little lesson you gave me yesterday.  You should always do something you love just because it makes you happy.  I'm keeping the tablecloth.  I'm not sure if I'm going to use it as a tablecloth, frame a piece of it or turn it into a blanket. What I do know is whatever I decide to do with it I'm going to smile every time I see it.  Happiness doesn't equal perfection.  Happiness is doing things you love. 

I kinda stopped blogging in February.  I'm not sure what the reason was now...I think maybe spirituality month was a bit personal and I felt inadequate posting about it.  I'm in a better headspace and I'm going to jump back on the horse and start blogging again.  Look for a post soon.

February = Spirituality

Now that the sickness has mostly cleared our house, I have time to blog again. It's better late then never. :)

I'm not sure why I decided to add this one so soon on the rotation. I think my reasoning was to get myself motivated to find a church. We have (maybe mostly me) been dragging our feet finding one. So this month the top priority is to find a church. Which shouldn't be too hard since I'm an equal opportunity religious person. I don't believe their is one TRUE church. The hardest part is finding one that will suit all of our needs. With five people in the family that can be difficult. 

We tried Roswell Presbyterian Church. It was a beautiful huge church. The bigger boys loved it. Who wouldn't when they have a air hockey table in your classroom. :) The now five year old wasn't keen on going to a class alone. So he came with me and super sexy husband.  Mistake!!! The now five year old does not have an indoor voice. He was bored out of his skull despite the church bag (bag full of activities) I brought to keep him occupied. I spent most of my time in the lobby. No one said hi to us, it was huge and very daunting. I quickly ruled it out. I'm looking for a bit smaller. 

I think this Sunday we are going to try the church where the now five year old goes to preschool. He should be fine going to class on his own. Half of his class goes to the church so he will have friends there.  I've heard great things. Look out Northbrook United Methodist Church the Pierce's are coming. :)

My goals for this month are 

• Find a church
• Have some sort of Bible study/worship in the mornings
• Keep a gratitude journal
• Read some books on spirituality and religion
• Figure out what and who I want to be spiritually
• Random Acts of Kindness at least once a week

Find a church is pretty explanatory.

The next three are all go together. I would like to spend time reading my bible more and having some kind of worship in the morning before I start my day. Which also blends into keeping the gratitude journal. I want to make that part of my daily routine. I think I need to remember the positives I have in my life. 

Figuring out what and who I want to be is probably the biggest thing I need to decide.  I grew up Seventh Day Adventist. I'm not sure that fits me, but I don't know if anything else does. My core is wrapped so tightly with Adventism that I find walking into a Sunday church almost as an act against God. I can feel my skin prickle waiting for the lightning to strike :) I feel safe in the routines of the Adventist Church but I'm not sure if it's comfort or belief that keeps me coming back.  I'm so complicated.  I really should have a church of Erin :) Since I don't believe that Adventist are the only way I can get to Heaven I'm open to finding a church that will work for us. 

I want to preform random acts of kindness at least once a week. I want helping people to be part of my religion of Erin. 

That's this month in a nutshell.  

I'm still making bread and using less processed food.  Life is good.  Have a great day!

The end of Project Health

So January is over and tomorrow starts a new project. Over all I am really pleased with how this month went. I am more conscience about what we eat. I'm making an effort to minimize the processed foods that we eat. We are eating at least two vegetarian meals a week. I'm making bread! I'm making more food from scratch!

I never got around to making the cheeze-it's. I had all the ingredients but then super sexy husband used my cheese :) I now have new cheese. As soon as I make them I'll post.

I made Pioneer Woman's Chicken Soup this week. I added noodles and served it with homemade bread. It was soooo good. I'm really thankful for the happiness project if only for the fact I'm cooking more.

I'm drinking more water. I'm taking better care of myself.

I ordered my sleep pills. After being back ordered I got them all yesterday. I had an awesome nights rest. I didn't wake up until 5am, and managed to go back to sleep. Yay!  I'm hoping this will help me with my 6:30 am mornings. I'm not a morning person and I did try (kinda) I managed to wake up at 6:30 twice :) I'm going to keep trying. Mostly because my children want to see my grumpy sad face in the mornings before they go to school.  Going to bed by 10 pm has been challenging. The boys aren't in bed till about 9 pm and it give me an hour with super sexy husband. I'm finding that it isn't enough time. I decided maybe 11 pm is more realistic.

Yay for Happiness Project Month One! Now all I have to do it keep this up while starting my new month!  See you all tomorrow.  :)

The week I did nothing on my list.

This week was a bust for meeting my goals.

I did manage to go to bed early a couple of nights and I woke up early 2 out of 5 school mornings. Wednesday morning I had to get up and out of bed by 6 am. Super sexy husband was off on a business trip and I was PIC (Parent In Charge) I thought about having the kids play "wookie" (it's what son #2 used to call playing hooky) but decided I'd be responsible. Darn responsibility!!! Friday I decided to reward my great job earlier in the week and slept in till the now 5 year old had to go to school.

I didn't make bread, dough, breakfast muffins, or cheeze-it's. I bought all the stuff to make them. :) I'll just have to do them this week. I'm okay with that.

We really lack good Mexican food here in Georgia. Let me just state for the record. Nacho Cheese sauce should stay far far away from Mexican food. It doesn't belong. I definitely don't need my enchilada swimming in a pool of it. That said, we had company coming over for dinner last night and we decided we would make enchilada casserole, mexican rice, black beans and a salad. I made Mexican rice from scratch last night for the 1st time!!! It was really good :) I also put dried black beans in the crock pot with onions, spices and chicken broth. Super sexy husband who has been super supportive with my crazy bought corn tortillas that had basic ingredients!  Yay!!! Only thing I didn't make was the enchilada sauce. I'm feeling more confidant and I'll definitely try it next time. Dinner was a success and I used less processed food.  Score!

I'm still drinking more and more water everyday. I'm remembering to bring water with me when I go out. When we eat out I order water 9 out of 10 times (okay, 7 out of 10 times).

I've decided to give up caffeine and booze. I drank my last Half Caf Pod. I'm now on decaf :( I know, I know, but I was drinking too much caffeine. It was making me not feel so good. So I pulled the plug. I had to give up booze because I either get a headache or I have crazy insomnia.  It's just not worth it.

Even though I didn't do all the things I wanted to do this week, I'm still happy with the progress I've made. I'm more conscious about the choices I make with food. I'm adding new things to my Happiness Project for this month. I'm excited by the on going process this has been.

My goals for this week.  Yes I did cut and paste last weeks list  :P

• Continue to drink more water
• Wake up at 6:45 am 
• Make breakfast muffins 
• Go to bed by 10:00 pm
• Make more sandwich dough.  Try to find something the kids will like.  
• Make homemade cheeze-it's 
• Read Organized Simplicity
• Take boxes to Goodwill
• Continue to clean, purge, and organize bedroom
• Oh...and maybe exercise - guess I better find that Wii Fit (I found the Wii Fit!!!)  

I caved and bought bread

Yes I caved! My children needed something to put their jelly on. The sandwich bread needs a little work. Don't get me wrong it's super yummy. The one problem is the crust. The book recommend that you didn't wrap the bread because it would get too mushy. Instead we followed the directions and put the bread cut part down on a non porous surface. We did and the crust got even harder. So the next day I put it in a bread bag I had on hand. By the afternoon the bread had soften, Yay! Next day we all had it for toast. It made wonderful toast. The boys do not think it is wonderful for sandwiches. The bread book has a couple more sandwich bread recipes so I'll be making more dough this week and testing them out. If that doesn't work I'll be hunting on the internet  :)

We made two french loaves to go with dinner tonight. Just pulled the dough out of the fridge and presto! It was a little more involved than that but not by much. I can't stress enough how easy this has been.

I'm not only making bread but I'm making ice cream!!! I had found a great dark chocolate ice cream that had only the basics and it was delicious. I can't find it anywhere anymore :(  I bought my self a ice cream machine. I've made chocolate ice cream twice and both times it was fantastic.

As for my other goals....

The biggest change I've noticed so far is I'm drinking more water. I'm making an effort to make sure I have my straw cup with me at all times. I'm bringing it with me in the car more. I'm trying to order water with my meals. I'm more conscious about it now than I was ever before.

Ten o'clock bedtime is getting closer to ten :)  I did order my sleeping homeopathic meds. I had stopped using them hoping to save money and that maybe I didn't need them any more. They should be here this week. I'm looking forward to sleeping. I hope they still work.

Tomorrow I promised my super sexy husband that I would get up at 6:45 and see the bigger boys off to school. I might go back to bed. I didn't promise I would stay awake.

With the holidays I got off the green smoothie wagon. I'm going to ask super sexy husband to make some before bed so I have them in the morning. Yes, he makes them. He's better at it then I am :P

I'm making more meals at home. I'm starting to go the extra step and make all my food from scratch. It might be a little more work but it tastes so much better in the end.

I'm aslo working on our home goal. Our home goal is To simplify our possessions and organize our house by March 2012. I decided to eat the frog and start with our bedroom. I'm making headway. I can see the floor and walk with out tripping. It's taking a bit of time since I want to go through everything and minimize. I've taken 2 boxes to Goodwill and I have two more to go this week.

My goals for this week are....

• Continue to drink more water
• Wake up at 6:45 am 
• Make breakfast muffins 
• Go to bed by 10:00 pm
• Make more sandwich dough.  Try to find something the kids will like.  
• Make homemade cheeze-it's 
• Read Organized Simplicity
• Take boxes to Goodwill
• Continue to clean, purge, and organize bedroom
• Oh...and maybe exercise - guess I better find that Wii Fit